再不考线图,2019就完了! | 支招小作文
听说每个高分烤鸭都星标了新航道3分钟学雅思
雅思小作文真题直击 | | 栏目推送说明
分享雅思考试小作文真题范文。每一篇范文都经由专业团队反复校对,最终外教审查定稿。成功就是日复一日那一点点小小努力的积累。
本期小作文供稿:
章 跃
下图来自剑桥雅思官方指南
高分范文及解析
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核心考核点:变化(线体现出数值随着时间的推移而变化)& 比较(尤其是线与线之间的数值差异和曲折差异)
举例理解三个核心概念:
✔ 变化:burglary的数量从2003年到2012年有变化。
✔ 数值差异:robbery的数量一直比burglary的数量小。
✔ 曲折差异:robbery的数量比burglary的数量稳定。
Introduction
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可以根据曲折程度分组,也可以根据高低位置分组。如果以曲折程度分组展开写作,如下:
Body
先总写曲折度的区分: The number of burglaries was unstable compared with that of car thefts and that of robbery. 再分写具体情况: Burglaries were on the rise between 2003 and 2004 and reached the peak (approx. 3,800). The subsequent few years witnessed a rather rapid slide to roughly 1,200 – the historical low, followed by a few years during which the number stabilized at around 1,400. 注意:有咩有依赖the number作主语?没有(是好事)。主语有没有变化?有。有咩有依赖动词描述线的曲折?没有(是好事)(on the rise, slide)。有没有写数个零碎的句子?没有(是好事)(两句话,一句简单,一句用状语方式复合)。Car theft was the crime that was alleviated and then deteriorated, (数值越往下降,情况越好,所以选用alleviate来避免机械描述数据上升;情况越糟糕,所以选用deteriorate来避免机械描述数据) and the year of 2006 was the turning point that saw the minimum (2,000) and the start of the growth to the original level (approx. 3,000). 有咩有避免过多的动词?避免了(是好事)。 The chance of being robbed was constantly low (而不去写数值低,不然就是机械描述数据了), and the annual number was within a narrow range (已经可以表示“稳定”,因为是narrow range) of 500 to 900 cases.
总结写法:
1、找到能够让写作内容简化和清晰的分组方法。
2、主语的多样性。
3、避免依赖表示“上升/下降”的动词,而用别的词性形式。
4、避免全文机械描述数据。
Conclusion
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