怎样和焦虑症的另一半相处
Living with anxiety can be tough — your thoughts might race, you might dread tasks others find simple (like driving to work) and your worries might feel inescapable.
焦虑症让人过得很痛苦——你会纠结，别人觉得简单的任务在你这也成了艰巨的任务（比如开车去上班）忧虑的感觉让人无处可逃。
But loving someone with anxiety can be hard too.
而跟焦虑症患者一起生活的人也会很辛苦。
You might feel powerless to help or overwhelmed by how your partner's feelings affect your daily life.
你可能会感觉爱莫能助又或者被另一半的焦虑连带一起陷入痛苦。
If so, you're not alone: Multiple studies have shown that anxiety disorders may contribute to marital dissatisfaction.
如果你遇到了这种问题，你并不是一个人在战斗：多项研究表明焦虑症可能会导致婚姻问题。
"We often find that our patients' ... partners are somehow intertwined in their anxiety," says Sandy Capaldi, associate director at the Center for the Treatment and Study of Anxiety at the University of Pennsylvania.
“我们经常发些我们的患者的另一半也会被他们的焦虑所影响，”桑迪·卡帕迪说，他是宾夕法尼亚大学焦虑治疗与研究中心的联合主席。
Anxiety is experienced at many different levels and in different forms — from moderate to debilitating, from generalized anxiety to phobias — and its impacts can vary.
焦虑症表现为不同的程度和不同的形式—从轻度到重度，从普通焦虑到恐惧症—它的影响也不同。
But psychiatrists and therapists say there are ways to help your partner navigate challenges while you also take care of yourself.
但心理医师和治疗师们说，还是有办法可以帮助你的伴侣应对挑战，同时也照顾好你自己。
Because an anxiety disorder can be consuming, it can be best to start by talking with your partner about the ways anxiety affects daily life, like sleeplessness, says Jeffrey Borenstein, president and CEO of the Brain & Behavior Research Foundation in New York.
因为焦虑症会很费神，所以最好的办法就是先跟伴侣谈谈焦虑症怎样影响到了他的日常生活，比如失眠，杰弗瑞·伯伦斯登说道，他是纽约的大脑与行为研究基金会的首席执行官。
Something as simple as using the word "stress" instead of clinical labels can help too.
有时一些简单的小事也会有所帮助，比如用“压力”来代替那些临床医学术语。
"Often people may feel a little more comfortable talking about stress as opposed to ... anxiety [disorders]," Borenstein says.
“通常人们谈论压力比谈论焦虑症会更轻松些，”伯伦斯登说道。
"Even if the perspective of the other person absolutely makes no sense to you logically, you should validate it," says Carolyn Daitch, a licensed psychologist and director of the Center for the Treatment of Anxiety Disorders in Farmington Hills, Mich.
“就算别人的看法在你看来没什么道理，你也应该表示理解，”卡洛琳·达赫说道，她是密歇根州法明顿山焦虑症治疗中心的主人和持证心理学家。
Try to understand your partner's fears and worries, or at least acknowledge that those fears and worries are real to your partner, before addressing why such things might be irrational.
首先应该努力去理解伴侣的害怕和担心，或者至少承认这些害怕和担心对他来说是真实存在的，然后再试图说明这些事情是主观的。
Anxiety doesn't have an easy solution, but helping someone starts with compassion.
焦虑不容易解决，不过还是要先用同情去帮助别人。
"Too many partners, particularly male partners, want to fix it right away," Daitch says.
“有太多的伴侣，尤其是老公们，总想马上就解决问题，”达赫说道。
"You have to start with empathy and understanding. You can move to logic, but not before the person feels like they're not being judged and ... misunderstood."
“你首先得有同理心和理解。你可以用逻辑去分析，不过首先还是不能让伴侣感觉自己受到了评判和误解。”
If your partner is overwhelmed by anxiety, encourage your partner to seek therapy.
如果你的伴侣无法摆脱焦虑，可以鼓励他去接受治疗。
You can even suggest names of therapists or offices, but don't call the therapist and set up the appointment yourself, Borenstein says.
你甚至可以提供一些治疗师或者咨询办公室的名字，但不要擅自打电话治疗师预约，伯伦斯登说道。
You want the person to have a certain level of agency over treatment.
你得让他感觉自己能某种程度上掌控这个治疗。
Capaldi says she often brings in a patient's partner to participate in therapy and to bolster the patient's support system at home.
卡帕迪说她经常会让患者的伴侣一起参与治疗，然后在家里改善患者的支持系统。
"The three of us — patient, partner, therapist — are a team, and that team is opposed to the anxiety disorder," she says.
“我们三人—患者，伴侣，治疗师—是一个团队，一起对抗焦虑症，”她说。
But don't talk to your partner at home the way a therapist might.
不过在家的时候不能用治疗师的口吻来说话。
For example, don't suggest your partner try medication or ways of modifying behavior.
例如，不要建议你的伴侣服用药物或者采取其他的调整行为的方式。
"Let the recommendations about treatment come from the professional" even if you yourself are in the mental health care field, Borenstein says.
哪怕你自己就是心理健康领域的，也要“让专业人士去提治疗建议”，伯伦斯登说道。
"I personally am a professional, and I wouldn't [prescribe anything] to a loved one."
“我自己就是专业人士，不过我从来不会给自己的爱人开什么处方。”
问题：
按照文中观点，假如你是心理医生，你可以给自己的伴侣治疗吗？
留言回复正确答案，前十名朋友可以获得红包奖励哦，赶快来试试吧！